We were in the kitchen and talking with a dear friend and he was sharing with us Jeremiah: 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. As our friend was talking to us about "the good" that God plans for us I had this very clear thought.
God knew that Ryan was only going to be on this earth for twenty years and then He was going to call him home to make a huge impact in many lives. That was always the plan. Knowing this God had to choose Ryan's parents carefully. His parents had to be able to deal wisely with his uniqueness so as not to crush his spirit and then be strong enough to deal with the loss. And this plan was meant "for good and not disaster." So God chose Tom and I twenty years ago to be part of this plan for good. I can honestly say, "What an honor!" Even in the pain, we see good.
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| I give you my precious son, Ryan. Cherish him, love him, and allow him to become the young man I designed him to be. |
Psalm 127:3 See, children are a gift from the Lord. The children born to us are our special reward.
With our earthly perspective it would be easy to rant and rave that this isn't fair...we deserve more years with our son. Why did He give him to us if He was only going to take him away? But with a heavenly perspective we can trust God and are grateful that we were chosen to have such a wonderfully unique relationship as parent with this precious gift of a child God rewarded us with for twenty years. Those twenty years with our "gift" shaped us into who we are today. We would never trade that experience just to be relieved of pain.
So now we have to trust God for the rest of the verse, the rest of the story; "....not for disaster, but to give you a future and a hope." That's why life isn't over for us. We have a future and a hope and God has the plan. We trust Him with it.
Gail, I can not tell you how much this post just ministered to my heart! Often times I get so caught up in all the "work" of raising my children that I forget that they are gifts from above....entrusted to Jason and myself. Your heart and relationship with our Saviour is such an encouragement!! Thank you so much for posting. You and Tom and your children are continually in my prayers. God is truly working in amazing ways and using your family!
ReplyDeleteGail, Beautiful. We sometimes call our last daughter our blessing as "we" didn't intend to have four children, but really none of it is "our" plan. I often remind myself to be "present," accepting I don't know the earthly plans we have together. I also fully embrace your perspective, our role as parents is to allow our children to blossom into the beautiful butterflies that God intended them to be. You are incredible parents and Ryan was so blessed you were chosen. Love your insights.
ReplyDeleteHi Gail,Dan and I continue to pray that God will comfort you and help you carry out His will while you are hurting so deeply.Thank you for sharing your heart with us and many others.Sometimes it's hard to read because it always makes me cry,but I guess I from time to time need to cry in order to realign my thoughts with things that really matter.Like,loving God,doing His will and accepting things the way they are and being gratefull.Your a very gifted writer.
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